The Piss Up

This stems from the lessons learnt session they have afterwards (I think Lois should actually call it that, but toby insists on calling it going down the pub for a chat.)

Mark explains he's happy with how it went but under pressure admits he didn't actually have fun. He was concentrating too hard. Toby puts it down to the fact he didn't drink that much. Mark explains he didn't want to get too drunk because he was determined not to embarass them. Once Toby learns that he's touched but convinced he's foun the problem. Further prompting shows that Mark'a never got really pissed and so Toby is determined to make sure that this is sorted out.

Now I can get in my mind why Toby would not want Lois to be there but I can't figure out how lois would not want to be there and there's no way he'd not tell her. She's got to be going somewhere- To see a kid. A godchild.

So why don't they wait until she's free. Because it has to be done asap. It's a hump that needs to be crossed. They expect it to end in tears with him parlaytic and in bed by 4pm. It's not meant to be fun. It's a step to being fun.

But that's not what happens. It's a beautiful sunny day, first of spring and they have champagne in the garden. A bottle with some crunchy nut cornflakes. At this point Mark seems to get merry very quickly and Seb and toby look at each other concerned that this could be over before he begins.

Mark, unaware of these concerns merrily grabs a banana before leadin them to the pub. There they drink an play table football. Then they order some lunch (mark notices one of the things about being wasted is you don't really give a fuck about how much you're spending.) he bets Toby that he will last longer than he will.

Next thing we see it's five o'clock and they're carrying Toby home. 'Problem with Toby, no sense of pacing'. Mark considers taking the tenner off him now but figures he'll only spend it if he takes it. He leaves his card at home and takes £60 with him reasoning that will stop him spending more.

Seb persuades him to come away from suburbia. He's never been to the east end and gets shown round Brick Lane. Then they're having a quick dirty burger to keep them going when they get a call from Lois. She's worried that Mark's in a gutter. She comes after them because she doesn't trust Seb (he has form for slinking off with someone).

When she joins them they go into a club and Mark admits he's never danced in public. But he has spent hours in front of MTV impersonating people. Then Billie Jean comes on (alternatively I would love it to be these guys: he's got the moves. He's all go. Dances with Lois. Tries to dance with Seb but he's not having it. Finds himself dancing with a girl and then Lois starts to panic.

She takes Seb into a corner and discusses what they're going to do. She's worried he's a virgin and he's going to spoil it on a drunken binge with a floozy. Seb points out that there's nothing to spoil. She says she thinks it's nice he's waited. Seb points out he hasn't waited. He's been kidnapped.

However their concerns amount to little because a phone goes off in Mark's pocket and he has to go outside to answer it. He's taken Toby's phone with him by accident and Toby was panicking. But Mark wasn't going anywhere with that girl and thinks nothing of it. In fact what he's thinking right now is he feels a bit funny.

Mark stays outside and has a sit down. And a chunder. And a little bit of a cry. But one about how he's never been able to do this before. It's borderline tears of joy. Certainly that's how Seb spins it. They get a cab home.